122813 Ehwaz

Transformation does not mean everything must change; nor must all be lost.  Comfortable habits from the past can facilitate relationships in the future.

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I for one am grateful for these words...  because things are changing so quickly it seems.  I realize it is simply the culmination of the change -- the birth happens suddenly, but one does prepare for 9 months prior -- but still, this last week has felt like a house dropping on my head.

So it is reassuring to know that though relationships change, they need not dissolve altogether.  Acceptance and non-judgement.  And yes, using old habits, ways of working together, to ease into the new form the relationship has taken.  Which is excellent, because we all change, and thus our relationships must change also.

More comfortable for me to talk about right now is my renewed interest in singing.  It's never been totally dormant, but it has, mostly, lain fallow (unless you count in the car going "65 I swear, officer" down the highway.  Belting is a requirement at that speed.)  Suddenly, I am exploring vocal warm ups on You Tube (Eric Arceneaux), paying attention to my support (mostly), and trying to find my classical voice.  As I used to take voice lessons, many of proper singings tools are comfortable old habits.  Rusty, but comfortable.  Like putting on the prom dress and realizing you just need to iron it out and make adjustment to one seam.

An uncomfortable habit is videotaping myself to see what I really need to work on.  My voice teacher used to record me on tape; I never like the sound of my recorded voice.

I was happily surprised to realize I wasn't horrified by the video tape.  I am unable to say I was awesome, because, I really don't know.  But I was decent.  I didn't cringe away from my voice or even from watching myself.  And now I know a lot of things I need to work on.  Work-on-able things.  So somewhere I developed the habit of being able to critique myself in a positive fashion.  Yay me!

Of course, I have no desire for singing to replace any of my other loves (reading, riting, rithmatic or rumination!) so I hope this transformation means my skills have developed enough to fit something new into the mix.

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122913 nothing at all (seriously, no rune wanted to be pulled.  The universe was busy *G*.)

123013 DagazR:  Today is a day to keep moving ahead, no judgements or analysis.  One step in front of the other, slow and steady, with a deep breath in between.  Make sure each step is finished before you move on, but don't stop to critique.

I hope you have a great day!

-Lila